OPINION: A critically trivial analysis of politicians’ hobbies
The world of politics is fast paced and relentless (apart from during recess- thanks for that Parliamentary Bureau, that’s really helped our analytics!), so politicians don’t really have much time to do normal-person things.
OPINION: ‘Freedom of speech director’ isn’t a real job
ALERT!!! Lecturers are being oppressed!!! Their freedom of speech is under attack!!! Don’t worry though, the Tories will save them.
OPINION: The curious tale of Hvaldimir the suspected Russian spy whale
The name's whale, beluga whale. Or Hvaldimir [Wale-De-Mir], to his chums. In the last few days, one of the ocean's biggest viral celebrities has appeared once again on the coast of Sweden. Suspected to be a Russian spy agent - no, it's not Abba, although that might...
REVIEW: The Labour Party’s merchandise
Political party merch can be one of the most wasteful uses of material, the question is, how wasteful has Labour been with theirs?
OPINION: Arresting pensioner Just Stop Oil protestors is not a good look for the Met
In the last hour, two Just Stop Oil protestors have been arrested by the Met police for… walking in the road?
OPINION: ‘Secret Tory’ is a not-so-secret tw*t
Wednesday morning gave us the most underwhelming reveal since the Taylor Swift/Ice Spice Karma collaboration. For those of you don’t live your lives on Twitter, ‘The Secret Tory’ is a ‘hilarious’ Twitter account that has amassed almost 300,000 followers by claiming to...
SATIRE: Bojo’s diary
The diary of Boris Johnson was keenly expected to be handed over yesterday, but the invisible ink isn’t yet dry, and so the deadline has been extended to Thursday.
SATIRE: The power of youth: An unfiltered, Gen-Z view of UK politics
By Maximilian Jenz Meet Sir Nigel Fancypants, Member of Parliament for Upper Crustshire and self-appointed expert on all things elitist. He really shines in front of the cameras. Saying everything, but nothing at all. However, it’s time for the annual photo op...
OPINION: We love to hate our politicians
Many people seem to hate politicians. The reason is simple, you may think: “Politicians are egotistical and dishonest.” But a deeper look at our responses to politicians reveals something a bit more complex. The Book I, Mammal: How to Make Peace With Your Animal Urge...
OPINION: Blair, Bombs and Brexit – what if things had been different?
In life, the impossible question is, ‘What if?’. What if this or that had or hadn’t happened? British politics has been full of these ‘sliding door’ moments in the last 20 years. Liam Fitzpatrick gets out his crystal ball and looks at the alternative realities...
REVIEW: The Lord’s day kiboshed by an unholy trinity of political interviews
We get little in the way of solving an NHS crisis from either of the two biggest parties and Nadine Dorries still defending Boris Johnson, just another UK weekend then.
OPINION: What’s the point of UKIP?
UKIP leader and former disgraced Tory MP Neil Hamilton explains why UKIP is still lurking around…Prepare for lies, right-wing waffle and to get very, very angry.
SATIRE: The Tory guide to dealing with the cost of living crisis
If you’re a Tory, it’s very easy to think that you’d manage just fine if you were struggling to pay for basic necessities during the cost of living crisis.
SATIRE: Five reasons why Tina Turner should have been UK Prime Minister
The death of legendary rock ‘n’ roll musician Tina Turner, aged 83, has saddened the world. She sold more than 100 million records worldwide and won 12 Grammy Awards. But there was one thing she never quite managed: becoming UK Prime Minister. Punching Up tells you why she would have been the perfect PM.
OPINION: Politicians and WhatsApp – a toxic relationship
It is a universal truth that social media group chats are some of the most treacherous, volatile communicative environments.
SATIRE: A day in the life of… Keir Starmer
Keir Starmer is an incredible man (as in not credible), his lack of charisma and intruige makes him the perfect candidate to leech out every single piece of satire imaginable. So, here’s a day in the life of Keir Starmer (according to Punching Up).
OPINION: The House of Lords is managing post Brexit Britain better than the Tories
Shock: House of Lords comes across as more reasonable than the government on EU citizens' rights...We didn't have it on our bingo card either. For all its archaic elements the House of Lords, has been incredibly effective in scrutinising post-Brexit Britain....
OPINION: Sunak squirms when grilled by… Alison Hammond?!
An embattled Prime Minister met an institution in crisis on Thursday morning, as he joined Alison Hammond on the This Morning sofa to talk new immigration figures, Suella Braverman and... Jilly Cooper? Sunak must have been rubbing his hands with glee when he saw his...
OPINION: Only Rishi Sunak can stop knighthood inflation, if Nadine Dorries gets one over David Bowie, god help us all
A terrible scourge is permeating British politics and it’s not just tidal waves of Therese Coffey sponsored sewage water, it’s an exponential growth in absolutely embarrassing honours lists.
OPINION: Tories fall into infighting – again
The Government are tearing themselves apart again in the name of Boris Johnson. In other news, 'bear shits in woods'. It’s been a typical Tory week with the Party playing its greatest hits, the encore of a dying government...
REVIEW: Three British shows that teach you something about politics (without you realising)
Sometimes you want a show that’s non-political. We’ve had enough BBC dramas about political scandals that are barely out of our collective memory, copaganda (sorry, Happy Valley), or too far-fetched to be at all relatable.
OPINION: Speedy Suella lives to fight another day… again
To the shock of nobody, Rishi Sunak’s government has once again investigated itself and found it did nothing wrong. Liam Fitzpatrick laments the lack of accountability in Sunak’s government and of Speedy Suella Braverman.
OPINION: Labour need to campaign like Tories to find General Election success
The Labour Party have been hiding away from political success for the past 13 years, yet they could be walking into their best chance to oust the Tories in next year’s general election.
SATIRE: There’s only one way to sort out politicians’ lazy language
Unfortunately, we have to listen to politicians speak a lot in this country. Often many words are said without actually saying anything. It must be remembered that MPs and ministers have enormous influence, as can the often lazy language that they use. If anyone needs to remember that, it’s them!
OPINION: It’s time to make closed book exams a distant memory
Exam season has once again rolled around and with it millions of students from SAT’s universities have been left desperately cramming their heads full of information.
OPINION: James Cleverly stars in ‘Excessive’
The government can often unintentionally parody television, but not often do ministers actually try to impersonate the stars from our screens.
SATIRE: In memoriam: Dominic Raab’s career, 2010-2023
Dominic Raab is finally throwing in the towel after 13 years in Parliament. Punching Up's Liam Fitzpatrick pays 'tribute' to the man behind the vein. It’s a sad day in Britain as one of Britain’s finest minds announced his departure from the political arena with...
OPINION: The Public Order Act only consolidates Britain’s toxic attitudes to striking – we have to change
Just like the strikes, Britain’s rage against protestors is misguided. What they do has little long-term impact on our lives and potentially a big one for them
REVIEW: The Second Sex
Simone de Beauvoir's "The Second Sex" is a pioneering piece of feminist literature that delves into the historical oppression of women. Despite its publication in 1949, the book's themes and ideas remain relevant to contemporary feminism. It continues to inform...
REVIEW: Chums: From riches to leaving the country in rags
Whether it’s the Bullingdon club or the botch job of Brexit, the roots of Britain’s ruling class are rotten to the cure but few writers have given us a truly comprehensive guide to explain just why this is the case, Simon Kupers ‘Chums’ is the concise timeline to fill this unoccupied void.
OPINION: Suella Braverman, the race car driver
Last summer, now Home Secretary Suella Braverman got caught speeding; now she’s mired in controversy about her handling of it. Reiss Mason asks why there has been a sudden influx of car-based Tory incompetence.
OPINION: Thirteen years of Tory Rule has made us our worst selves – it’s time we ask for better
Thirteen years of Tory rule, individualism and lack of community care breeds a toxic mentality in the people. I know this because I’m one of them, and so are you – and it’s time to actually do something about it.
SATIRE: A future Lib-Lab government: Peace at last or coalition chaos continued?
Some might argue that delving this deep into a purely hypothetical duet of scenarios is pointless and unhelpful. To that, I say dogs still dream. Best case This all relies on humility and honesty, two things politicians generally avoid at all costs. Crucially, to make...
OPINION: NatCon highlights frighteningly fascistic future of the Tory right
Parties in opposition usually spend a long time navel gazing, a period of ideological soul searching as they lick their wounds and plot a way back into government. Labour has spent much of the last decade arguing with itself about what kind of party it wants to be,...
REVIEW: The Conservative Party after Brexit: Turmoil and Transformation
Tim Bale’s second book on the Conservative Party lays bare the seven years of shite that got us to this point.
REVIEW: The Conservative Party’s merchandise
To many people’s disgust, there is a way of pumping more money into the Tory Party. Buying party merchandise is one of the single-most pointless revenue streams for political parties, because who in their right mind would walk around with Tory merchandise? Anyway, here’s Punching UP’s comprehensive review of what you can buy from the Tory’s merchandise shop…
SATIRE: A day in the life of…a 55-year-old ‘Brexit Bloke’
Brexit blokes…the lifeblood of every intimidating pub in the country. Instead of Tom, Dick and Harry we’re looking at John, Dave and Paul, sat chatting about every borderline offensive topic you can think of over a worryingly cheap pint of bitter.
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